KIDNAPPING, LOUKOUMS ET PÈRE NOËL : BIENVENUE À NARNIA


Chose the next episode at the end of the video Let’s get in context. Four siblings, Peter, Susan, Edmund and Lucy… (four shitty names) are send to a manor in the countryside during WWII to escape the bombings. It’s a very difficult time for kids, for sure particularly for tiny Lucy here, who’s what… one? one and a half? The guy who sucks at guessing. Unluckily for them, the foster family is not exactly fun. “No improper use of the dumbwaiter” “NO touching of the historical artifacts” “5…6…7” Hide and seek, what a wonderful idea! Especially when you can’t touch anything Get out of this room now. If you don’t want to end up cleaning the toilets with your own toothbrush. WOW When she hides in this forbidden wardrobe, she finds herself in the parallel world of Narnia. At least she seems happy. “What are you?” “I am a faun” James McAvoy! Well well well, you again If you’re here to add another personality to Split, it’s not the right place. “How would you like to come and have tea with me?” This guy is weird, and I’m not even talking about the ears and goat legs. “I think I should better go back home.” Yeah that’s it, go away Lucy, go away “But I live just nearby!” Oh, Mister, leave this child alone, okay? “I’ll open a can of sardines in oil” If you keep going, I’ll pull your nipples to make sure you’re a goat! “Have you ever had the chance to listen to Narnian lullabies?” Look, Mr Goaty, stop! “I am going to play one then.” Then play your shit. [Mask Off – Future] Not gonna lie, he did mean to kidnap her. [Evidence: the rapist’s flute] Well, this was before he reconsidered and nicely took her back to her commode and she got the fuck outta Narnia. Because actually, all Narnians have to send humans to the Witch. “Everything good ! I’m back !” “Lucy doesn’t want to play anymore.” [Lucy is the hazard of the group.] “I’ve been gone for hours.” Following his little sister at night, Edmund ends up in Narnia too. Uh… sup? “How did you get into my kingdom ?” But no luck for him, he stumbles upon the Witch. “I- I was just following my sister.” “Your sister ?” “She said she’d met a faun, named… Tumnus.” Why are you… snitching on everyone, Edmund? What’s going on? Etmunt, VHAT IS VRONG VITH YOU? VHY ARE YOU SNITCHING ON YOUR SISTER ?! “What would you like to eat?” Get him comfortable… “I love Turkish delight” God damn ! Are you serious with your delight, Etmunt? To sum up, she promises that MAYBE SOMEDAY he’ll be King of Narnia if he gets her his siblings. “Really?” Okay, so he’s really power-hungry. You don’t even know what Narnia is, you could be the Toilet King, you’d still be happy Awesome. Eventually they all get into Narnia, and Susan and Peter are forced to see that lil’ Lucy shit was right “All the apologies in the world won’t be enough…” “At least we can add this!” Yeah, so they have a very brutal way to play. Constant headshot. Lucy absolutely wanted to introduce them Goaty …it may be complicated. “Tumnus the Faun is officially accused of high treason” It seems like someone has been chatty… [I AM GUILTY] “Don’t worry Lucy we are going to find a way” “Why? He’s a criminal after all.” [I’m a pimp now after all] [shitbag] If I had to put you in a case, Edmund, it would be as the “stupid boy”. You know, the one that’s kinda uncomfortable, where no one wants to be. “Let’s not dawdle! This place is not safe.” Is it just me or a damned beaver just gave you safety orders? “Ah, and Mrs Beaver is cooking!” “We are right on time for tea.” [This beaver times the day] “Aslan is coming” “Who is Aslan?” Thanks for asking! What’s with the three simpletons over there? “(Aslan what a funny name haha)” “(Aslan, Asloon, Aslaam ?)” “(Hello)” After listening to a prophecy told by a beaver living in a twig house, Peter logically decides to go back to the real world but it was not taking into account Edmund’s legendary stupidity, who decides to just walk into the lion’s den. “They are at the beavers, in the house on the dam!” “It this is true, you are not completely useless.” “I was just wondering if…” If you wouldn’t have some Turkish delight around. Oh, fine, I’m just joking, I’m messing with him! “if it was possible to have some Turkish delight?” We are on a good green screen, for sure 2005, yeah, not excusable. Let us go, friend, we must not lose time! Oh shit I’m sorry! I’m sorry, I’m sorry. The more we advance into the movie, the more it feels like there’s no turning back. “Merry Christmas, Santa Claus!” “It will be merry, no doubt!” [I have nothing to do on this set] “We mistook you for the Witch.” [We have no respect for you.] “Presents!” Presents! Presents, of course. “A single drop of this potion can heal any wound.” Was it the only way you could think of to equip your party with magical items? No need for epic battles, it’s popping right out of Santa’s ass “You’ll have to use this sooner than you think.” And he starts thinking he’s Lancelot du Lac now We’re pretty fucked, I can’t even slice a steak. “We came to see Aslan.” You’re being embarrassing, what’s the point of raising your sword like that? “Welcome to you, Susan and Lucy, daughters of Eve.” “Where is the fourth?” “Our brother has been captured by the White Witch.” More like he gave his ass away. “He … betrayed them” Now that sounds right, thanks Beaver. In the meanwhile, the Witch is still after them, and she sent some little wolves to drag them back by their panties. “Then you will die like a dog!” He just ran into my sword, I didn’t get it! “Sir Peter Wolf’s-Bane, knight of Narnia” Well that was an easy side quest! They manage to find Edmund simply by following the other fleeing wolves. Yeah, absolutely, the enemies are dumbasses too. “Follow him, he will take you to Edmund.” There you are. I warn you, no Turkish delight here. Aslan gets Peter to understand he needs him to take back Narnia. No idea why, because he’s like ten, just got into middle school, he can barely write… “We are going home?” “You are.” “They need us too.” Lucy, come on. You can see you’re totally useless to them. “This human will die!” [The dog knows it’s him] “on the Stone Table.” When did we take that turn? “The Witch renounces the blood of the son of Adam.” Phew, I’m relieved! For a moment I thought the movie was getting serious. As if. “How to be sure you will keep your word?” Okay, so the Lion just sacrificed himself, for those who didn’t get it. “Susan!” Susan, if you don’t get more expressive, you won’t get to play in other movies. From the beginning I kept to myself but I’ve got my eye on her now. “Goodbye.” You do understand he’s heading for the slaughterhouse? “Why isn’t he fighting ?” OK Susan, this is it. At first I thought you just didn’t take Narnia seriously, but it’s actually just that your acting is insipid! Even her little sister Lucy acts better! “Merry Christmas, Santa Claus!” “We are going home?” “You are.” “Susan!” “Why won’t he fight?” We’re going to make a pretty little compilation out of those, Susan, what do you think? Reminder: at first Aslan came here with the four kids to “free Narnia”, Apart for giving out his hairy ass, he didn’t do much yet. “Did you honestly believe that by sacrificing yourself you would save the traitor?” Soiling confirmed. “He’s dead.” “Then you have to lead us.” “What are your orders?” [You become King real quick in Narnia] I don’t mean to break the mood, but I think it would have happened like this. “Don’t forget to fill your flasks with apple juice, we will need strength on the battlefield.” “Put your PB&Js in boxes to keep them fresh.” “And most importantly, don’t forget your Yu-Gi-Oh cards so we can have fun during recess!” I’m sorry, I really am, I just can’t take that kid seriously, I can’t. “Are you with me?” “Scheisse!” In the meanwhile, Aslan resuscitates, because you see: “When an innocent clear of any crime agrees to be killed instead of a traitor,” Wait, but you already killed people? Like, the wolves earlier? And the guys you sent, it was not to make peace. OKAY, alright, chill Simba! Chill! “then death itself decides to turn back.” And obviously, the Witch was not aware of that. “Check my blade!” “Don’t be a pain in the ass, but the butter knife away.” “Get on. Hang on to my mane.” “I SAID MY MANE FOR FUCK’S SAKE” In the end, Aslan, the “innocent lion who never committed any crime”, just finishes the job, he knows how to do it. And the four kids are crowned Kings and Queens of Narnia. “I give you Queen Lucy, the Valiant.” “King Edmund, the Just.” Not to be a party-pooper, but Edmund the “Just” doesn’t feel accurate. Not necessarily Edmund the Traitor, no! Edmund the… the Collaborator, Edmund the Shitty, there’s something to find! “Queen Susan, the Gentle.” The Insipid, you mean! Susan the Insipid! “King Peter,” [the Teacher’s Pet] Fuck the basic principles of royalty, I guess. Two kings, two queens, all of them siblings… Alright. By the way, it’s really fun, getting a crown, drinking from a horn… But what about reality? Mum and Dad facing the Third Reich? No? We don’t care? [15 years later] Obviously they made their choice. “It reminds me of something…” “Lucy!” “Where is she going?” “May I know what you were doing in this wardrobe?” Are you aware you’ve spent fifteen years in this wardrobe and never once visited your parents’ grave? “We can never go back?” “It will happen when you expect it least!” I hope you liked this video, and I’m thankful for you comments on the last one. It made me want to do even more travel vlogs. You seem to enjoy the mix between Père Castor and images. If it’s not done already, subscribe. I know everyone says it, but it matters to us, it shows your support. Especially for the silent community. We like to know you’re here. Blow up that like counter, we all like it, let’s not hide it. Most importantly, don’t forget to vote in the poll for the next Math Watches. I’ll leave you with the outro you seem to like, you rascals. Now three, two, one…

100 thoughts on “KIDNAPPING, LOUKOUMS ET PÈRE NOËL : BIENVENUE À NARNIA”

  1. Alors déjà je m'appelle suzanne et c'est pas un nom de merde alors si vous pouviez respecter un peu ce serait gentil sur ce j'adore ta chaîne

  2. "Edmund qu'est-ce-qui t’arrive ? Pourquoi tu es en train de balancer ta sœur ? "
    Avouez que son accent était magnifique ? XD

  3. N’OUBLIE PAS DE T’ABONNER N’OUBLIE PAS DE T’ABONNER FRANCHEMENT JE VAIS ÊTRE HONNÊTE AVEC TOI SI TU T’ABONNE SEPT FOIS TU AURAS DU CHOCOLAT CHOCOLAT ATTEND T’AS DIT QUOI ? CHOCOLAT! MAIS PERSONNE TE CROIS CHOCOLAT ! ALLER ARRÊTE ÇA CHOCOLATTTTTTTTTTTTT !!! ah j’adore cette chanson

  4. Edmund est vraiment un Conn**d il troc et trahi sa famille pour des loukoums !!!! Mais sinon très bonne vidéo continue 😜😜😜😜

  5. En vrai, je crois que c'est encore un des meilleurs souillages x) entre le jeu d'acteur un peu pété et les incohérences niaises c'est juste énorme

  6. Je dois être le seul à me refaire tous les msf comme si c'était une série xD
    Mais je suis hyper fan donc continue comme ça Maths parce que tu me fais toujours autant rire

  7. Malheureusement….dsl de gâcher votre enfance….mais Narnia est seulement l'imagination de c'est 4 enfants qui fuient la guère. Ils utilisent leurs imagination pour s'occuper et s'inventer une vie meilleure. C'est pourquoi ils ne peuvent plus revenir à partir d'un certain âge. Quand on grandi, l'imagination n'ai plus pareil…ils ne viennent plus dans Narnia car ils ne jouent plus à s'inventer un monde imaginaire. Ouais c'est triste…il y a plein de choses qui le prouvent quand on y réfléchit… Ex: se n'ai pas un hasard que se soit la plus petite qui "découvre" le monde de Narnia, elle a plus d'imagination que les autres grâce à son jeune âge et commence à s'inventer une histoire, en embarquant ces frères et sa sœur pour oublier leur triste vie…la guère….leurs parents qu'ils ne verrons plus….Bref ! Bonne soirée ! 😅😅(Et re dsl)

  8. C'est quel film ou c'est la parodie de Narnia sauf que les castors ils appellent la sorcière blanche la pute blanche

  9. Narnia est vraiment Mon film préféré ,mais je ne prend pas ta vidéo mal ,j'ai bien rigoler au contraire ^^
    Et je c'est que edmund est un gros connard qui trahis sa famille mais c'est mon personnage préféré ,son esprit rebelle et tendre a la fois est exeptionel 😳

  10. Cette vidéo est certes très bien, soulève des problèmes de la série mais je voudrais rappeler qu'au début, les Chroniques de Narnia ont été écrites par C.S. Lewis entre 1949 et 1954 et que ce film est très fidèle à l'histoire originale.
    Par exemple, la "béatitude" de trois des quatre Pevency au nom d'Aslan est décrite dans le livre, Edmund éprouvant au contraire un désagréable sentiment à la prononciation du nom d'Aslan. Une bonne partie des points soulevés dans ce film mériteraient donc que l'on lise le livre où ils se retrouvent également, d'autant plus que ce dernier est très bien écrit comme le reste des chroniques, d'ailleurs.
    La dernière remarque que "ledit innocent" Aslan décrit par "Maths se fait des films" est la gueule d'Aslan ouverte après qu'il ait renversé la Sorcière Blanche. On ne le voit pas la dévorer, et on retrouve ladite sorcière dans les deux films suivants ainsi que, pour les livres, dans la chronique précédente et trois des suivantes, ce qui fait qu'elle est présente dans cinq tomes sur sept. C'est un être pas immortel mais presque, et Aslan ne la tue jamais dans aucune des chroniques, puisque c'est (attention spoiler au cas où le film sorte et qu'il respecte ce point) un humain, le fils du Roi Caspian pour les connaisseurs, qui tue la Sorcière Blanche.

  11. Hum, j'espère juste qu'il a lu les livres. Et Aslan meurt puis ressuscite CAR, c'est un des milliers de clins d'oeils biblique. ( La résurrection du christ toi même tu sais ). Et j'ai remarqué que mon enfance était de la putain de propagande pro chrétienne super !

  12. Quand il a mis la tête de lucy sur peter ! G tellement pété de rire! 🤣😂 je fait un sreenshot !
    Ps: je suis une licorne!🦄

  13. Cette vidéo m'as mise K.O. 😂😂 Se serait bien si tu faisais aussi d'autres videos pour " le prince Caspian " et "l'Odyssée du passeur d'Aurore "

  14. Je viens de reregarder cette vidéo et je viens de tilter qu'au début tu dit:
    «Peter, Suzanne, Edmond et Lucie, 4 noms de merde»
    Super…je m'appelle Suzanne…

    Mais sinon très bonne vidéo encore une fois

  15. Je t'interdis de critiquer le jeu d'acteur de Anna Popplewell (Susan) c'est une de mes actrices préféré si tu le refais je me désabonne 😡

  16. Aslan heuheuheu c'est marrant comme nom…

    Aslan? Aslane, Asloune ?

    Bonjouuuuuur

    😂 CE PASSAGE !!!!

  17. Narnia 2 je t'en supplie 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

  18. SPOILER : Les 4 sont rappelés dans Narnia plus tard "au moment où ils ne s'y attendent le moins", c'est à dire le jour où ils ont un accident de train mortel. lel (oui j'ai lu les livres)

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